This quilt square was made in memory of my husband, Scott. When I started thinking about making this square I felt overwhelmed. I wasn't sure how to use this square to sum up my feelings abut him and his death. We both were in agreement about being organ donors. I spent 10 years working as an RN in a unit that specializes in people waiting for heart transplants. Scott knew what it was like for me to work with these patients and decided that he would be an organ donor.
But his death was a suicide and it has been very hard for our family to understand this. So, when I tried to make a quilt square that was meaningful, regarding his life, I wasn't sure what to do. After examining our life together, I realized that what attracted me first was his eyes, then he ended up donating his corneas so that someone else could see. Throughout our 30years together I always could sense so much emotion from his eyes. His eyes were deep, sad, lonely and at times happy and hopeful. He spent a lot of his life looking out for others. He could see suffering in the people around him and he did what he could to help them. He never had a lot of money, but he had a heart and gave it unconditionally. He came from a hard life and made the best of what he had. With this in mind, I made an eye for the quilt square. I used some of his clothes and used colors that were in his eyes. I associated his caring with the "Grateful Dead" Eyes of the world. This I interpret as having eyes that see beyond the every day events, and can see the deeper thoughts and cares of those you meet. He did this, but, I also realized that he didn't see a lot of things. Things like how much he was loved, how much he contributed to our world. At times all he saw was the worst that could happen, his sense of pessimism was smothering to those around him. Therefore, I added the veils over his eyes to portray his inability to see others views and his inability to let things progress on their own.
All in all, Scott was a wonderful, caring person that made the best of what he was brought up in. He was troubled. I hope in some way we can make something good out of this. We all love him and miss him tremendously.
Karen, Melanie, Ian and Tristan